some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Randomize
