Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
