so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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