Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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