omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
