are you still at the devil's house?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
