I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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