it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
you had me at cake vodka
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
