He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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