dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize