Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize