Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
