she was so not down for the gang bang
Where did you get a picture of my penis
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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