weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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