But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
