ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
