Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
did you just send me my own nude
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize