Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I feel like a drive thru vagina
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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