you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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