I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
