i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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