i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
