So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize