he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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