It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
