so let's talk penis.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
