i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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