Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize