i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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