Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
