Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
