i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
