There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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