If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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