I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
