In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
