this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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