you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
