I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
