I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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