So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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