Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
