just tell him i said nine months
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
