At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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