It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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