is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
