More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
