idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
even my farts smell like vagina
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize