Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
