why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
